Being Alone

I stole this from KaPau! cause it’s great, and I like it, and cause she’s cool like that. Also because I’ve been spending some time with myself, kind of taking a break from dating, and running around like a socialite constantly obligated to some activity. It’s been nice. I bought New Moon yesterday, I’ll finish it today I’m sure. I’m mad at the book, I’m team Edward and he disappointed me, made me cry when he left Bella. But I won’t bore you all with my teenage fantasy book, lol. I was thinking of going somewhere alone today. Maybe I’ll go to the movies. I mean, I guess I should start some laundry and vacuum the house and mop, but after that I have the whole afternoon free. I frequently go for walks along in the woods, I guess I’m not totally alone, I bring my dog, but that usually leads to her running in the creeks, getting muddy and then I have to give her a bath, which she hates, and dodges by getting on my bed and making it muddy too. I think I’ll skip nature today and stick to civilization, it’s too hot anyway, when it cools off she can go hiking again. Maybe I’ll finish my book at starbucks, I could use some coffee this morning.

Old Kittah formerly Fat Kittah

I really shouldn’t be spending a lot of money right now, I have a lot of bills coming up. My dog is due for her annual check up and shots next month, my old cat is acting kinda funny and may have to go to the vet, might just be her arthritis hurting her. My car needs this squealy belt fixed and I may need new breaks. I got screwed over last place that did this for me, and thus is why 2 years later both have to be fixed again. I just got a check from the state, turns out I had “unclaimed property” in the sum of almost $600, from some old stock dividends my mom had in my name and transferred to me when I turned 18, we still aren’t sure why they didn’t roll over to the insurance policy or why they ended up with the state, the ins. company knows my address and contact info.  So both will use this up, if not a little more. But I think I can afford to throw in a cup of coffee today for the heck of it. Time to get in the showah if I’m going to do any of this today! Alone!

crap…. thought I’d have nothing to blog today

But I guess I do, I’ll try to keep it short. No word from Brown, don’t know if he got the sunglasses yesterday or not, I guess it can take 2 days via regular mail, hell I’ve had bills from right down the road not get to me until after they are due, we have serious USPS problems in this area for some reason. SERIOUS. I also, kind of think that if he’s in the mindset that he thinks I was clingy or needy, that he will think it was just another desperate attempt at contact, which it wasn’t. I honestly don’t think he’s “the one”, I had however hoped at least at one point, we would be friends in the end. I am to tell the truth a little disappointed at that. But I have other friends, so it’s fine I guess. I figure if he doesn’t say anything by tonight, he got them, thinks I’m clinging, and won’t even say thanks. But I’m assuming he does have them after today, and I’m not going to think about it again.

I hadn’t heard from “S” since Tuesday when I never replied to his text that night asking if I was done with my training. oops. Last night I got drunk on 3 beers while reading Twilight. It was a great evening alone. I figured I was free of him, that he got the message. Apparently not. He just texted asking what I’m doing tonight. I really don’t want to deal with it at work. I never deal with drama at work. And when I tell him I don’t intend to talk to him again, I’m positive it will be BIG drama. The kind where he says I’m ugly, fat, and he didn’t like me anyway. That is his style with women when he’s rejected. ugh… so ya, not doing it at work. NOT. AT. WORK!

I still don’t really know what I’m doing out there as far as dating. I think I’ve kinda put it all on hold for the next week or so. I’m considering match.com still, but it’s only a consideration at this point. I’m still very put off by online dating, lying men, non-committal men, and my reactions to it all. I want to find the right guy, but I’m tired of looking for it. I’m actually enjoying sitting at home with my beer and book in the evenings, not feeling like I’ve got a million things to do and people I’m obligated to see a few days a week, it was wearing me out. But, with being done with Twilight as of today, wanting to start New Moon and not having it yet, I’ll clean house tonight and feel bored again, and I’m sure, start to look around for some form of entertainment which never bodes well for me. Maybe I’ll go buy New Moon tonight and see what else is good at the bookstore. I guess I’ll do anything to avoid cleaning the house and cat boxes. ;-P

pms

I woke up this morning with a huge zit on my left temple. Then I realized I was liking reading Twilight, a story of teen angst. Then I was craving chocolate when I wasn’t even hungry and bought 3 cookies and ate them all along with a sweet tea, and I have no sweet tooth. Then my friend posted some adoption video that was funny on facebook, I cried and laughed at the same time. And to top it off, as I post this my right foot is cramping up into charliehorse position of spread toes and excruciating pain.

I don’t think I’m getting much done tonight. I pity the fool that calls me tonight. Pity da foo! I think I’ll finish this beer and read the rest of Twilight and try to avoid anything else emotional.