Archive for the 'Friends' Category

01
Nov
10

Sheep


Them

I went to a bar crawl Saturday night for Halloween. I am so disappointed in the city and people for their lack of Halloween spirit. Yes, people dressed up, but they were all the same… girls in short slutty costumes that weren’t even scary or halloween themed, and guys all either trying to be funny or macho, again, no scary. It was like watching a flock of sheep herded from one pasture to another. I only saw one other vampire, and she really was less than creative with it, only wore fangs with no other costume. Okay, no costume would have fit her rather gigantic size, but still, be more creative.

scared of an std maybe?

The winner of the contest was some guy dressed up as “1000 dildos”, yes, he had like 1000 dildos all over his body. LeSigh. I live near the most soulless, hypocritical, pretentious, city I’ve ever been to. Since when is Halloween about dressing up as slutty as possible to attract male attention? Really? I want to know when it lost it’s fright and became a sex fest? Or is just this city? Cause quite honestly, for the bible belt, the women sure do have a lot of fake boobs and bleached out hair they like to flaunt in VERY skimpy clothing while drunk and kissing another woman! The only thing scary about these women is what disease you

are you kidding?

may catch from messing with them! If only I’m kidding. As we left, I saw one group of people, dressed in real Halloween costumes. Out of the 5000+ that I saw all night. I’m sure there were a few more, but mostly, this is what I saw.

Me?

Maybe it’s me that needs to loosen up? Maybe I need to be more comfortable morally degrading myself for the attention of men, and in some of their cases women. Am I that much of a black sheep? I just feel like they are soulless, mindless, heartless, zombies or something down there. All made from the same cookie cutter and don’t have a mind of their own. They worship the disgusting slutty reality stars and celebrities that are out of control and think they are role models.

It’s not just Halloween that has me down, it’s a lot of things. Remember C1 and C2? I was with C1 Saturday night, she got a call from C2 saying she left something personal under the mattress in the guest room when she moved out in such a hurry. Of course C1 and I can’t wait to get home and find the dildo and lesbian porn that she is so embarrassed to have and make fun of her… not that we knew what it was right? But at least we laughed all night. When we finally did get back to the house to have a look under the mattress, we were right about only one thing. The dildo. The rest was quite a shocker. There was pot, a pipe, a spoon, a wire mesh thing, a baggie with white residue in it, and some sort of crack pipe/rock smoking pipe (I’m guessing, I’ve only seen them not handled one) that we didn’t take out of it’s bag to examine closer. C1 was furious that drugs were brought into her house, I wouldn’t have gone to the extremes to be rid of it that she did, but whatever. She smashed it all with a hammer, and threw it in a dumpster not near her house. But it does explain why C2 was so insane!

Sunday night we scared trick or treaters at her house. I dressed in  a black cloak with vampire makeup and hid in a tree. People thought I was a statue/prop, until I moved, and in some cases chased them down the street for throwing things at me. One kid about 14 got violent, but he was vandalizing my friends yard, kicking over a tombstone prop, when he saw me, he began swinging a large pillow case full of candy at me. I took him by the arm and marched him to the cop living next door, and then to his father who didn’t have a word with him until I got mad enough take the kid by the arm. I guess had I been a statue, his kid destroying property was ok, but since i was a human, he said something. Mostly it was pretty funny though, several parents saw me and set their kids up, some took pictures of me, some couldn’t decide if I was a real person or not. I was amused until the kid that tried to beat my head in with the sack of candy.

On yet another front of the weekend, my neighbor/hairdresser has been telling me I need to meet her fiance’s brother, that we would really hit it off. Friday night when I got off work, he was there on the back deck and we all started talking. We did hit it off in some ways, I could see being friends with him, but I just don’t care to date anyone. And should someone want to date me, they would have to really put forth a lot of effort with me, and be sure they are the right kind of guy for me because anyone who doesn’t think they can live up to my standards, well, don’t bother, I’ll just dump them anyway. Also, physically, he was a little “big” for me, dressed sloppy, and suspect he would feel quite comfortable with the sheep at the bar crawl on Saturday. Not that he went, he was going sailing at the beach. Which in at least one way makes him cool enough to be my friend, for now at least.

 

Which brings me back to the why don’t I want a boyfriend thing… I wish there was a man out there that met all the things I want in a man. What are those things you ask? Well first, he’s upfront about his intentions with me and understands my scrutiny in not just taking his word that he’s honorable. Did I mention he has to be honorable? I like the idea of old fashioned romance, I want to be courted, respected, by a man, not a manboy who can’t make up his mind or is too scared to go after what he wants in all aspects of his life. Not some moron who tells me how he feels via. text message or email. A big part is also intelligence, not necessarily book smart, but someone who is capable of knowing and doing good. Someone capable of reasoning and figuring out difficult situations. My list of apparently unrealistic wants goes on… but I won’t because quite frankly I don’t want to hear the onslaught of men telling me to lower my standards. I’d rather be alone.

I really feel like after the busy weekend I need to just retreat somewhere quiet and alone for a while. I just can’t deal with social things right now. I can’t deal with the sheep.

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11
Oct
10

It’s always been him


Did you ever have someone that touched you in a way that no one else ever has? That is “The artist” for me. He was my high-school sweetheart I guess you could say. We met when I was 15, he was 14… but of course he lied and said he was 15, at that age, guys never want to be younger than the girl they like. We instantly knew each other, it was always comfortable. I don’t remember a lot of details because I did a lot of “experimentation” back then, my memory is foggy. I do remember making out with him in my bedroom, in the game room, and all over my house. I never had sex with him though, it wasn’t that I was a virgin (long story, I won’t ever go into), but I wasn’t ready, I loved him, too much, so much that I couldn’t handle what I felt at such a young age. I was selfish, as I still am, I wanted him for myself, but didn’t want to have him in that way.

 

We didn't go, but we couldda looked all cute like this, love the 90's...

The artist was my best friend in the world, we talked on the phone daily for hours. No matter how bad my day was, no matter how much I cried, he made me smile, he made me forget it all, and no matter what, he understood and took my side. There was  a girl that was my friend once, she use to take me to see him on her moped on the service road along a major busy highway against traffic. One day we got into a fight over who was wearing the only helmet on the way back, I threw the helmet at her, I wasn’t wearing the stupid thing, and it all went to hell from there where she was concerned. It turned out she wanted the artist when we had met him, but I claimed him as “mine” and he only had eyes for me. She later turned into my high-school bully… I know, shocking that I had a bully considering who I am today. She asked him to homecoming shortly after that, we didn’t even go to the same school, he of course told me and told her no. On new years eve we couldn’t be together, something about him being grounded I think, and I had met a guy from another school, and cheated on him. Hold up… I didn’t sleep with the guy! I just made out with him for like an hour, he was a very cool guy! But needless to say, I felt horrible the next day, I told the artist what I had done. He was furious with me, he said he’d cheat on me three times to teach me a lesson. I don’t know that he did, as we grew up, he said he was just bluffing, but I don’t know if that was to spare my feelings or not.

I broke up with him shortly after that, it wasn’t the whole “cheating” thing, I just thought I didn’t love him anymore, I needed to be a teenager and date lots of boys. He was the first guy to ever send me roses. I remember it clearly, I came home from school and there were roses on the stairs on the landing of the house. My step dad had accepted them on my behalf, and said “you got roses today”. I was humiliated, not sure what other word describes how horrible I felt inside for hurting this guy who was begging for me to love him back, and I didn’t. I didn’t talk to him for a few months despite his calls. I was so torn inside, my family was fucked up, my mom screwed me up in that department.

We did eventually start talking again, and become friends, good friends. We talked daily I’m sure, he could make me laugh like no one I’ve ever met since. He would ask me to be back together with him sometimes, but I would resist, not sure. We started loosing touch when I went off to college and he didn’t. He had dropped out of high-school, or was kicked out for fighting, with teachers and anyone who challenged him. He had family issues too. I took him to get something up at school after my first semester… I was trying to be someone I was not at that time, it wasn’t pretty, and he was also not sure who he was, and it felt like we lost our connection. We didn’t talk after that.

I went on with my life, lost touch with him, but thought about him a lot, wondered where he was, how he was, if he had ever gotten over me. We had been so close for five very crucial years of my life and of his, he was a big part of me becoming me. He was gone and I didn’t know how to find him. Well, thanks to the powers of social networking, the interwebz, I found him 3 years ago on myspace, which shortly after I abandoned since it was riddled with teenagers and drama. But during that time, he told me he was engaged, to be married in a few months and couldn’t resume our friendship the way it had been as to not upset his new bride to be. It hurt, I’ll admit it, I hoped I could be close to him again, I love him, I will always love him, maybe not in that romantic way, but in a deeper way that I’ve never felt for anyone since. Maybe it could be romantic now that I’m more mature, but it will never be. I accepted it, I’m actually really happy for him that he’s happy, that he got over me and how I hurt him, I know I did.

It still hurts, it’s totally selfish since I know I’m “the one that got away” for him, and I want him to want me, and I want to want him, and I want to be close to him again. I can’t, I can’t risk messing up his happiness, because I’m so screwed up myself, what if I screwed up his marriage and then didn’t want him? I can’t do that. But what brings this up is I found him on facebook tonight, he accepted my friend request in a matter of seconds. I can’t describe how it made my heart sink so fast, the pain I felt knowing how fast he did that, and wondering how his marriage is. The temptation to screw that up for him, to butt into his life for my own selfish wants is horrible. I’m a bad person for wanting him this way. I miss him, something terrible, I want to hear his voice. He had video’s posted one where he’s playing with someone’s baby, not his, and he’s talking and I started crying, I miss that voice.

He’s a pretty successful artist now, amazingly talented, he’s happy. Reading his page, then his website, it was like reading my own heart and mind, it’s amazing how we still think on the same wavelength, still want the same things in life. I had it all at 15 and threw it all away. I’m not sure where we stand as friends, I’m hoping his wife is more secure now in their relationship and can stand some form of communication between us. Even if nothing can ever be more than a distant friendship, I’m okay with that and will never of course tell him how I feel for him still, twenty years later. It’s been a few days since he added me and I wrote most of this, and we haven’t really talked, at all. I said hi to him on his wall, and got a one word reply, I’m guessing she is still not happy about us being friends. That really sucks.

06
Oct
10

Crazy people are… well, Crazy


So I have this friend, she’s nuts, I mean really really nuts. I don’t have to explain this to some of you who know some of the stories but for those that don’t I’ll just give you one of the most interesting stories since I’ve known her in the last 5 years. And that will also ring in crazy number two to help understand the current situation. She was also the one I went zip lining with a few weekends ago. Remember the car ride straight to hell? Yup, more of her!

The Beach Story

Last May after my graduation Mr. NY was headed to the beach with all his friends from back home for his birthday for a week. He was leaving from the beach to go back to NY, and you all know how that ended… in case you forget, he never came back from NY. But anyway, he begged me to come to the beach for the weekend before he left to see me one more time. So I’m going to bring Crazy1 and Crazy2, (C1 and C2 from here on out). C1 and C2 are roommates since C1’s husband left her and she lost her job all in the same week, C2 and her made friends at her new job and C2 was being foreclosed on and needed a place to live. C1 and I have been friends a few years, yes, she’s totally nuts… but, she’s fun, and her being crazy makes for interesting times, usually. C1 is joking with Mr. NY’s friend, she thinks he’s hot, he REALLY can’t stand her. Mr. NY tells me his friend, lets call him DB, really doesn’t want C1 to come to the beach, he’s scared of her, but we joke and I say C1 has huge boobs and likes to flash them and to tell DB. So he does and DB makes a joke to C1 about playing strip poker, she says she doesn’t know how to play strip poker but she’ll play strip baseball since the yanks are playing the mets while we are there. He agrees. C2 catches wind of this text joking going on between the 4 of us and FREAKS the fuck out. She calls me hysterical saying she’s not going because she knows Mr. NY’s friends she’s never met are going to rape her or make her show her tits. uh… okay… it was a joke, mostly an inside one between me and Mr. NY because DB did NOT really want to see C1’s boobs. So C2 backs out and flips out for a few hours. C1 and I decide to go anyway, I was going with or without them, but Mr. NY didn’t want me driving alone and didn’t trust my car to make the long trip. So we get there…. dun dun dun….

DB is locked in the master bedroom, which was supposed to mine and Mr. NY’s alone and won’t come out. He won’t answer when we knock, nothing! So we go with Mr. NY’s other friend who is nice but quiet and we hang out at the beach and drink a few beers that night and kinda pass out early. I got stuck on the sofa bed with Mr. NY, NOT happy about that! C1 and Mr. NY’s quiet friend were in the other bedroom which had twin beds. The next day me and C1 go to the beach and DB has awoken and all the boys watch soccer while we are at the beach. We come back and DB is WASTED so is Mr. NY and his team has lost the match. The other friend decides to drive home early since he’s from close by. So now it’s just the 4 of us this evening. Mr. NY and I really wanted some alone time, some quiet time to talk and be a couple, nothing big but we hadn’t had any privacy except the shower since I got there. So the baseball game comes on and they decide the rules for strip baseball. Mr. NY is outside smoking and comes in and C1 has already lost her shirt and since I’m on her team DB turns to tell me I have to take off my shirt, Mr. NY says “hell no! we aren’t playin this shit with dem” and grabs me by the arm and pulls me into the bedroom with the twin beds. So we pull them together to make one bed and try to turn on the tv, which doesn’t work, so he runs and switches the tv’s from the other bedroom so we can watch something. In the mean time, they continue with strip baseball in the other room. Last time I passed thru to the kitchen they were both naked and hiding under sheets of the pulled out sofa bed… I didn’t go back in.

Sudden Mr. NY’s phone goes off, it’s a text from DB, then there is a knock on our door, he panics and tries to show me the phone and what it says but I can’t see, so he throws the phone at me and goes to open the door, it’s C1. She says DB wants to talk to Mr. NY outside on the patio, he eyes his phone for me to read the message. C1 tells me DB just told her they found out they have to pay extra for us staying there and we have to leave. Meanwhile I know DB has hidden from C1 the first night, and expressed to Mr. NY he want’s NOTHING to do with her and doesn’t like her at all. So I finally get his phone figured out and read the text which says “come outside, keep it on the DL, don’t tell ur girl”. Of course, first thing he does is tell me, he always did. So after she says all this I go outside and Mr. NY is hanging over the balcony and sighing and tells me to go back to our room and he’ll be right there. So finally he comes in and tells me it’s not true. DB did something with C1 and is trying to get away from her. In the mean time C1 is freaking out because we are 4 hours from home with no where to stay at 11 at night. I’m having to lie to her because I don’t want to further freak her out. Mr. NY and I come up with a plan to tell her he called the leasing agency and they said no, they don’t have to pay extra it was a mistake on DB’s part.

I go outside and C1 comes with me and proceeds to tell me something happened between her and DB and I’m a horrible selfish person because of putting her in this situation and leaving her alone with him. I asked if he raped her, nope she says but she won’t tell me, and Mr. NY won’t tell me and I’m being told off for going to see my boyfriend and ask for a few hours alone with him before he leaves town for 3 weeks????? Finally I get it out of her. She tells me they started fooling around and she asked if he had a condom and he said no, so she said they weren’t having sex then and he asked her to give him head then and she said no, so he said “okay, can I titty fuck you?” she laughed in his face and he jerked off on her chest instead. She let him do this mind you, she could have gotten up and gotten dressed and stopped this at any point. But she’s humiliated because after he came on her, he got up and went outside and said “I’m good” and smoked a cigarette and came up with this cockamamie story about us having to pay to get rid of her. So after I’m done being told off, since it’s my fault, I go back and tell Mr. NY what she told me, he’s hysterical and tells me what DB told him happened. DB said he was wearing a “rape whistle” and she kept trying to kiss him and he’d try to blow it and she’d stop him. So then she tries to give him a hand job and her hands were like sand paper and he asked her to just blow him, she said no, so he DID titty fuck her and get up and say “I’m good”. Well… put the two stories together and you have the truth somewhere. Me and Mr. NY laughed with our heads in the pillows for a good 20 minutes after comparing stories and figuring out what to do. In the mean time DB figured out we stole his TV and now locking himself back in his room would be much less pleasant so he proceeded to text Mr. NY stupid pictures all night and C1 went to sleep on the sofa. We got up the next morning and left quickly.She told me off in the car for 4 hours on the way home, because it was somehow my fault she had a bad time. I should have gone to a club with her like she wanted. o_O She knew the only reason I went to the beach was to see Mr. NY! Why would I ditch him for some bar? Duh…

Which brings us to the present. I didn’t talk to C1 much of the summer because of that. She treated me bad on the trip and Mr. NY and DB and the other friend said not just then, but other times they saw her around me she treated me bad and they were going to stop it if she didn’t knock it off. I agree. I don’t ride places where she is the driver far away now. But I really didn’t see much of her all summer because I was so mad at the way she talked to me and her C2 roommate freaking out and now feeling justified because C1 told her she was right. ugh… so annoying.

 

not a fan of this dog

 

I took care of C1’s dog last weekend, this annoying monster of a dog. Yappy little obnoxious shithead stupid dog. But, it’s a dog, so I try to be kind to it. C1 got back from her trip to find out C2 had moved out, with no notice, no note, nothing while she was away. Now they are fighting. C2 keeps texting C1 and can’t even face her with a phone call! Dude! Who does that? Turns out because C2 has a new boyfriend and C1 doesn’t, C2 tells C1 she’s jealous of her new boyfriend…. lmao… really? C2’s boyfriend is a loser, drunk, and weirdo. She’s totally off her rocker and can’t face anything, she’s a chicken, and totally flaky. Hence why C1 has to have me watch her dog and a neighbor watch her cat when she has a roommate that lives there. She can’t even let the dog out into the fenced backyard or feed a cat once a day. Crazy people are just so, CRAZY! I really don’t want to hear about it anymore, but C1 keeps calling and texting me asking what to do, what to say. I’m sick with a cold, I really am out of it and don’t know what to tell her. I would have been done with the chick a long ass time ago. I don’t do chick drama, period, I just don’t. I can’t stand this shit and C1 has a life full of it. When drama comes knocking at my door, I move to another continent, period, so again, why is this person coming to me for advice? I don’t do drama, my advice is to walk away from C2! Change the locks, and forget you ever knew the bitch. Ugh… I can’t type anymore, I need to take some nyquill and go to bed. I just thought you all would enjoy the amusing “beach story” as some of my friends have come to know it and retell it.

29
Sep
10

The Doctor is in


I got an email last night from a guy asking for communication with women advice. It’s not that I discourage anyone from doing so, but realize, I’m not the best person to be asking dating advice from. I am seriously fucked up in that department. My blog is such a small part of who I am, of my life, and believe me, if you knew me, it’s not the most fucked up stuff about me. I’m not sure why, after reading this blog, after reading all the darkness inside me and how I feel about love and dating and relationships, why anyone would ask me for advice.

I’m on a journey right now, it’s all about me, I’m selfish, and I realize it. Yes, I am a healer by nature, I can’t stop myself from trying to help, but emotionally, asking me for advice, is bound to lead anyone to disaster. I heal the physical, emotionally I will just draw you into my own selfish needs and suck you dry. It’s not a threat, it is a warning, only the strong survive in my world, as my friends and lovers.

Yes, what Brown said to me about being so great is true, to him, it’s how I draw them in, it’s why they always come back, but the fun me, it’s not who I am all the time, not even the majority of the time.  If I love you, as a friend or more, I will do it with everything I have, I’ll fight for you, have your back even if you are wrong. Don’t misunderstand, it’s not that I’m not loyal like a dog, it’s just that if you mistreat me like a dog, I will turn on you and bite. And if you are one who thinks you are worse off than me, or who thinks it’s a joke, well, fine, find out the hard way.

I have no self control, I’ll accept you, make you think I’m great and you will feel great when you are with me, talking to me, but my darkness will come out, eventually. When you try to change me, or emotionally control me, I’ll shut you down, I’ll shut you out, which will make you crazy.

By all means, ask my opinion, I’ll tell you, and if you don’t like it and try to debate my advice I’ll tell you to shut the fuck up and ask why you asked me in the first place? Lots of people like to do that. I won’t argue with people, I become aloof, I ignore people I don’t like, I escape to my happy place and shut down, it’s what you do when you are raised by a raging sociopath who gets in your face if you leave a pencil on the table on accident or take too long between changing sheet music during your two hour piano practice daily. When you have no one to protect you, you shut down, internalize, and become fucked up as an adult. This is why if you ask for my advice, I’ll give it to you, I’ll try to help you, I may even have good intentions, however my dark jaded world view gives skeptical advice, it’s selfish, and it only applies to what I would want someone to do for me. And hey, I’m fucked up, so what I want isn’t normal, it’s not what most people want, it’s not what healthy people want. So by all means, ask me, just be prepare for me to pull the football out just as you kick and laugh about it. Not that I discourage you from asking, by all means, ask away, the Doctor is in…

22
Sep
10

Where do I belong?


Is this where I should be?

I feel like I don’t know where I belong anymore, I feel trapped, like somehow, if I go somewhere new, maybe I could get my appreciation for life back. I am at heart an adventurist. I remember when I was leaving home for the first time, driving 2 days with everything I owned in a truck and moving here, I felt like it was this great new adventure. I felt free, ready for something new. Now here I am, nothing is new here, I’m trapped again, worse this time. I was talked into buying a house, told I’d easily be able to sell it, and now, I’m trapped. I can’t take off on a new adventure as I want. I can’t buy a sail boat with the profits from the sale of my home, load up my 4 cats and dog and sail off into the sunset totally free from responsibility. I do, just get in my car sometimes and drive. I drive with no purpose, no place to go, and no idea where I’ll get bored and stop. But I never really get far enough for a big scenery change, not to get the sense of freedom I want it to give me, because I know I have to turn around at some point and go back home, to my pets (who I’d never desert), to my mortgage, to my job, my bills, my boring life.

I think I was born in the wrong time, maybe I should have been born in a simpler time.  People forgot to stop and enjoy the little things in life. People forgot that WE are what is important in life, above all else, the living things on this planet, are all that matter. Not our material possessions, no amount of stuff will make us happier. We spend so much time focused on so much stuff. Stuff just accumulates, it doesn’t hug you, it doesn’t love you, it doesn’t challenge your mind, exchange ideas, or make the world a better place. We accumulate tons of stuff, we eat tons of food, we want more, MORE, MORE! Of everything!

Not me, I don’t want more stuff, I want things simplified. What I want more of is steadily in decline. I want more beaches, waves, birds. I want more grass, wind, flowers. I want more rain, dew, dripping trees and fog. I want a cool morning where the crickets still think it’s night and chirp and the birds start to wake and sing and I don’t hear a single car passing, but instead hear the exchange of night for day. I want to get on a boat and watch the whales flip and flop and groan in the middle of the ocean, and dolphins jumping and playing near by, yet so far away from anyone else that we seem to be the only living things left on the planet.

I know my escapist thoughts aren’t normal, most people are content to move to the suburbs, get married, have 2.5 children, work until they are 65, and then retire and sit in a recliner in front of the tv until they die. I don’t want that, I want more and less. Less in material things, yes, I want certain entertainment items, transportation items, but I like things simple, understated, functional. More in terms of quality, more quality in the few material possessions I chose to keep, and more quality in the people I surround myself with.

Compared to most people my age  I supposed I’m not normal, sitting quietly with a book, with my ipod listening to this, while watching the ocean, is the most relaxing thing, the most ideal life I could ever want.

Where I sit now, at work, with pop radio playing, the monotonous daily tasks, all I have is my pandora radio and headphones and pictures I can find on google images to soothe me through the day. My imagination of where I’m headed next, who I’ll meet, what I’ll do and see, what it will teach me and what I can teach others occupies the corners of my mind as I click away at my mouse designing more letterhead, more business cards, more images to sell, more stuff. And at night, I’ll dream of my next adventure, soon to come, very soon.

20
Sep
10

pièce de résistance


He lives here maybe?

I haven’t been back on my okcupid account in a few weeks, cause frankly, I just don’t care that much. I only have it to make new friends when I feel like it, and well… I just really don’t care to check it that often. So what do I see when I open my messages tonight? Something totally blogworth! Oh ya baby! It’s a beauty of 3 messages! Lest start with drunken message number one!

DRIVING TO ATLANTA THOUGHT WE WOULD MESSAGE YOU

Sep. 12, 2010 – 1:16pm

HI GOODMORNING! JUST SEEING IF YOU WERE ON! ME AND CRIS, A BUDDY OF MINE WERE DRIVING TO ATLANTA!HE THINKS YOU LOOK LIKE MY X,BUT I DONT THINK SO I TOLD HIM,ANYWAY ENJOY THE FIRST DAY OF N.F.L. KICKOFF-GO FALCONS,ACTUALLY I LIKE TOM BRADY AND THE PATRIOTS BEST, BUT HEY! IAM NOT TURNING DOWN A FREE TICKET,WELL ENJOY YOUR DAY ,LOL AND I HOPE THIS IS THE BEGINING OF A GREAT SOMTHING! TIME TELLS IT ALL DOESNT IT? ITS GOING TO BE LOVELY IN ATLANTA TODAY SO I HOPE SOME OF IT RUBBS OFF ON TO YOU. YOUR DOGS CUTE ,I LOVE DOGS,IN SAN FRAN I WAS RAISED WITH CATS AND DOGS, OF COURSE THERE GONE NOW BUT I STILL THINK OF THEM FROM TIME TO TIME AND THE MEMORIES THEY INSTILLED IN ME.BY4NOW! WISH YOU WERE HERE CHECKING THIS GAME OUT WITH US,MAYBE ANOTHER TIME.SEE YA…………….MICKEY
Then a few hours later….

HELLO THERE

Sep. 12, 2010 – 4:32am

IM MICKEY,BORN IN CALI,MOVED TO ********** NOW **********, LETS BE FRIENDS

Then the pièce de résistance…. oh, it’s good, can you stand it? Can you wait? Wait for it… okay, hold on, you want his screen name first? naaaaa…. that wouldn’t be right, I’ll let you all suffer and just read the message.

SCREW YOU

Sep. 14, 2010 – 4:33pm

YOU MUST BE A POS,YOU AINT THAT FINE! HOPE YOU GO TO HELL! SO SORRY UR SORRY ASS CANT EVEN COMMAND THE ABILITY TO RESPOND BACK,YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY BABY,ACTIONS,ACTIONS,ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THEN WORDS AND THEY CERTAINLY DO IN YOUR CASE.I WOULD HAVE TO BE CURSED TO HAVE SOMTHING AS STPUID AND IDIOTIC AS YOU IN MY LIFE. YOU DONT HAVE ENOUGH CLASS FOR ME.
Oh yes, yes he did! I suppose he never bothered to look to see if I was on my profile recently or not. And yes, he types in all caps. I sure am sad I can’t date him, especially since that’s clearly stated on my profile that I’m NOT looking for. Any guesses how old this moron is? No? I’m sure you think he’s 25 or so… nope… he’s 40!
That site is, well… omg, lets just say, I’m not motivated to go back for another few weeks or months… cause wow.. the messages I got, well, as amusing as this one was, there were more. I am sad for humanity that this is what we’ve sunk to.
20
Sep
10

New adventure? or just hell on wheels?


Over the weekend I went zip lining for the first time, I was very excited to try this as it looked like a great adventure and quite exhilarating. Um, my “friend”, lets call her “Facepalm” (this is what you want to do when you are around her), is a nut job and a half! She was so worked up over the zip lining thing she had to take 2 ativan and still almost puked, yet it was HER idea. She talked the whole way there and the whole way back. First about this guy we met when we were out like 6 months ago, and has reconnected with. Anyway, ya, so this guy is very nice, and she doesn’t know why but she’s totally “eh” with him, not that into him, because she’s obsessed with some guy from back in highschool in her home town, that wants little to do with her, except to keep her wanting him basically. So I heard all about that. Then one of the other friends is getting divorced now, and has been raised in a traditional Pakastani house her whole life and is now in the US, on her own, and single, plus drop dead gorgeous, so we hear all about her dating crap. Thankfully the other chick, is a lesbian in a long term relationship and is probably the most sane one of the group, at least she’s not guy crazy, and mostly talks about her dog. She insists we go to McD’s on the way to the place because she’s hungry and no one planned ahead to eat anything healthy. So in the drive thru she YELLS over me at the cashier at the first window “THANK YOU!!!”, then turns to me and proceeds to chew me out because “you never say thank you to the drive through people, would it kill you to thank them?” Okay, hold up, first of all, I am extremely polite, I don’t YELL anything to anyone, over anyone, I say thank you when it’s appropriate, but when someone says “thank you” to me, as they should since I’m the customer paying them, I don’t say “thank you” back, I say “you’re welcome”, one of those etiquette things I was raised with, screw me, I know manners. She then says “the next window is your last chance to be polite” and as usual, as the young girl at the window handed me the heaping pile of grease in a bag, I said “thank you” in a normal voice, then she handed me my corrected drink (they got it wrong the first time) I said “thanks”, in a normal tone. Facepalm turns to me and screeches “I can’t believe you! Why can’t you say thank you?” To which I answered in a low and very serious tone “I do say thank you, when it’s appropriate, and I say ‘you’re welcome’ as well, but I don’t YELL it over people so the entire restaurant hears me, I say things in a normal tone of voice that is between me and the person I’m speaking to”. I wanted to turn around and go home right then, cancel the whole thing and ruin everyone’s fun then point the finger at her psycho abusive behavior! I think I’m understanding why Mr. NY said that if she talked to me that way in front of him or his friends again, someone besides me was putting a stop to it. She is abusive to friends and then demands the utmost respect. Facepalm kept asking why I was so quiet… uh… between all 3 of them being lawyers and talking job stuff, and then the guy stuff, I really had nothing to contribute. Plus I was already annoyed with Facepalm whining cause some guy at her new job doesn’t like her openly. Honestly, if I worked with her, I’d be screaming “SHUT UP!” in my head all day long! Just 5 minutes of silence wouldn’t kill her, seriously.

Finally we get to the place right on time and everyone was waiting on us and ready to go early. We gear up, sign the waivers, and head out back. I’m expecting some video or something… NOPE! Straight to the course! SWEET! But… there are like 15 other people besides us! Who wants to go first they ask… some little kids jumped up first, so I was like Okay, I’m next, lets do this shit! First line is a short easy one to teach you how to break and all that. It was fun and fast though. Yay! So then I wait the 20 minutes it takes for the rest of them to get to the first platform… waiting… not my thing. Finally we get a “no stop” line that is longer and faster! No stop means, you don’t put your hand on the line to break at all, you just kinda slow down a little on the upside of the line and the guy catches you or the tree has padding strapped to it and tuck your feet because you will hit the platform edge, which isn’t padded except for one, which still really hurts btw! So like 10 of these lines later, we’re finally at the end, each platform between the trees was a 15-20 minute wait on one end of the other… not cool. Won’t go somewhere that does this big of groups again. But it was cool, I want to try some more advanced courses in some other places some time. Or try one at night, that would be awesome. I would also love to do it when it’s cool outside, to feel the cold air on my cheeks, biting making them rosy would feel so good to me.

The double line is the last one landing next to that building

So on the way home Facepalm was amusing herself and decided that she wants to be like little bunny foo foo hopping thru the forest, except she wants to “bop” men on the head with a frying pan that magically makes them fall in love with her. She wants to sell this idea on QVC. Then the topic takes a turn in the worst possible direction I can imagine… masturbation and sex toys. I’m sorry, this is not something I really care to discuss with my friends, it’s just weird, and personal, and idk… weird! Facepalm goes on and on about how she’s broken her toy and needs a new one, and she’s broken 3 toys in the last year. I’m kinda of getting repulsed by the images in my head cause well, I’m not gay, and even if I was, she wouldn’t do it for me at all. She even starts trying to find out the adam and eve stores hours and try to convince me to take her there on the way home! Uh… no thanks, shopping for vibrators with my friends does not equal a good time for me, nor does this discussion, lets change the subject, buy your shit online so it comes in a discrete brown box and I don’t have to have visuals in my mind for the rest of my life. But noooooo… 30 effin miles of this crap! I may never get turned on again. Okay, let me explain why this conversation bugs me, because not only has it turned to “I want a new toy”, it’s turned to describing the types of good toys and details I really don’t want dancing around in my head! At this point my head hurts, I’m sticky with suncreen and bug spray and sweat and want to go home! I considered bailing out of the car on the highway at 80 mph just to be rid of the images and her voice in my head.

I also got told several times “yay, I’m glad you are back to normal now, I didn’t know who you were for the last six months”, uh… I’m still the same as I have been for the last 6 months, I just made the mistake of hanging out with her and had been avoiding her. I barely talked the whole time, which was noticed and mentioned several times, but I had nothing to say, not my kind of conversations, and hardly anyone talked because she dominated every second of every conversation that she started. Ugh…. Next time… No Facepalm, no huge group, faster/higher lines.

The good part is that I really did enjoy the activity part, when we weren’t waiting for ages or the rest of the people to go. When I was on the lines speeding through the air with nothing but the zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sound of me gliding across the metal line. I will definitely go back, but I will go with people who are fun and will make it a fun activity, not one I have to pretend that with each line I leap into I’m pretending to leap to my death to get away from her. She wants to go to the amusement parks halloween thing this year… I don’t think I can force myself to endure that, although it is a much shorter drive, maybe if I don’t have to ride with her and juts meet up with her I can handle it. I just don’t know though.




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